Bravo’s favorite girlfriends are back at it! Episode 5 of GG2D was full of surprises… and mistakes. I know you can relate; while we journey through this thing called life. As much as we try to design our life and in particular our LOVE life… it’s always filled with unexpected surprises & mistakes.
SURPRISE! I was pleasantly surprised to see how resourceful Abby’s 28 year old hottie, Will, was in finding her after their first “encounter”! He actually started shopping at her Mini-Mart in hopes of running into her again! Personally I believe their age difference makes them a mismatch, yet I always applaud a man for creatively going after what he wants!
“When a man truly wants to see you, he will find a way, NO MATTER WHAT. If he’s not making time for you, you’re not a priority, so don’t be a convenience.” – Love by Design
MISTAKE! Jake, Jake Jake….. Your teenage daughter sneaks out of the house and when you finally discover this, the LAST person you call is her mom???? REALLY? That should be your very first call! Reverse the shoes buddy… wouldn’t you want to be called first? Absolutely YES! It’s not about who is the better parent, it’s about smart, respectful co-parenting, and putting your childrens’ needs and safety before your own ego.
Kudos this week goes to Abby for taking time to self reflect and being honest with herself and those she is impacting.
She admits her mistakes:
To her daughter – “Divorce sucks. We need to figure out how to be better for you, and I’m going to try.”
To her young hottie – “ I wish I was in the right place for you. I have so much work to do on me, on everything.”
My Love by Design coaching this week goes to Lyla… AGAIN! Geeshhhh Lyla! Things seem to be going from bad to worse for you. I get it, I’ve been there, and I’m sure we all can relate with Lyla this week. When this happens – be aware of your reaction and attitude. We can stay stuck and miserable or choose to GROW from our pain.
Choose your reaction.
Choose your attitude.
Choose to GROW!
Lyla…. “You Give Love A Bad name”… can you hear the Bon Jovi song?
Here are Lyla’s examples of #BadAttitude – and ask yourself – do you give Love a bad name?
#BadAttitude1: Due to your ex-husband’s allegations of being an unfit mother, a caseworker visits your house to observe you and the children. Your mom flies in to help you make a good impression with the caseworker. Since her idea of helping didn’t meet your standards you yell at her, scrutinize her, hurt her feelings and basically shun her out of your house?!
You judgingly ask your mother, “When’s the last time you cried?”, only to be shocked by the answer of “3 months ago when my father died.” Have you become so self-absorbed that you don’t even inquire about the feelings and lives of others? When your mom offered helpful guidance (a mother’s job is to protect her children), you reacted defensively, believing and CHOOSING the implication that you’re not a good mother.
~~Unnecessary defensiveness causes unnecessary conflict.~~
CHOOSE to reduce the conflict in your life, and learn to respond versus react.
#BadAttitude2: At the office you have yet ANOTHER grievance complaint against you from one of your assistants. (Going through 6 assistants in a year is a strong indicator that the problem is with you, not them!) Notice the patterns in your life. You’re making enemies and it’s not good for you, the firm, or your life!
All of us have been stuck in a misery laden, self-destructive path at some point in our lives. The point is to not live there. The first step in embarking on a new and improved route is to ask yourself some very important questions. Start with these:
Do you own your mistakes?
Do you apologize when it’s needed?
Do you tend to be unnecessarily defensive?
And let’s end with an empowering question – How can I make this better?
Choose your reaction. Choose your attitude. Choose to GROW.
And always…Choose LOVE!